


Out of the Blue/Into the Black

by Adarian



Series: History of Middle Earth AUs and Explorations [2]
Category: The Lord of the Rings - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Gen, M/M, Platonic Male/Male Relationships, Platonic Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-28
Updated: 2016-04-28
Packaged: 2018-06-05 02:44:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,394
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6686020
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Adarian/pseuds/Adarian
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Legolas arrives in Valinor with Gimli, his father turns from him. Yet when Gimli grows ill, Thranduil returns to his son's side and attempts to mend their relationship.</p><p>Written like a record with an A Side and B Side with two similar stories with the same themes but with different riffs and lyrics. Both sad, but both with different hopeful endings.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A Side

**Author's Note:**

> You ever come up with an idea where you'll like this is going to break my heart but I need to write it? Well, here's mine. Because damn son, what does happen to Legolas in all this cosmology?

When Legolas arrived in Valinor with a dwarf at his side, Thranduil refused to see his son. Legolas had refused to leave Middle-Earth, fighting his own sea longing solely for the friendship of a mortal. And no mere mortal. A dwarf, the son of a trespasser and plunderer. Gimli served the Fellowship, but he was no ring bearer and had no right to enter their sacred grounds. Galadriel's grace alone allowed him to stay and only out of respect for her did he stay his tongue.

But when Legolas came to the estate in the forests, Thranduil made it clear that while he was welcome, Gimli was not. Legolas did not rage against him, as he might of when he was young. Instead he slipped away in the night, bringing the dwarf with him. Thranduil learned from another that Legolas built them a small cottage in the countryside and the pair lived a quiet life. Some of his kin had gone to visit and a few had pleasant things to say about Legolas' companion. As the years went by, Legolas did not reach out to his father and Thranduil waited. The dwarf was elderly and perhaps only had a dozen or so years left at the most. Let his son spend his time with him as they would have all eternity together.

Yet one night a caravan approached his estate and Elrond was escorted into his home. Thranduil was pleased to see his old friend but soon saw how weary he was, how heavy his heart lay.

"What ails you, friend?" Thranduil asked.

"You must come with me," Elrond insisted. "There is little time left. He is dying."

"The dwarf? I am surprised he still lives; he is near 300 in his reckoning. I imagine my son is troubled. Has he asked for me?"

"Thranduil," Elrond said. "Gimli is on his death bed and your son is fading. There is not much time until they are both gone. We must leave. Now."

Thranduil's chest tightened and he agreed to the journey. They traveled through the night and arrived at the little cottage, surprisingly humble for a Prince of the Woodland Realm. Thranduil entered after Elrond, gazing over the possessions that the pair had brought from Middle-Earth. Tapestries, books, and an axe displayed over a fireplace. It was how a common human might live. It was completely out of place to the estates that had been built in this land. But his son was no carpenter, perhaps this was the best he could manage.

Elrond bade him to enter the bedroom where Gimli lay. The dwarf rested under the blankets, his breathing laboured. He still spoke softly to Legolas, who lay on top of the sheets beside him. His son was indeed pale, his grey eyes missing their brightness, even if he smiled weakly. But as he looked up, his expression changed.

"Ada," Legolas gasped.

Thranduil stood still in the doorframe as the dwarf sat up, the pain in his face evident. Legolas put a hand on his back to support him.

"What brings you here?" Legolas accused. 

Thranduil said, "I would like to speak to you alone, Legolas."

Legolas insisted, "Whatever you will say, say it to us both."

Gimli patted Legolas' hand. "Speak to your father, lad. I am alright."

Legolas hesitated before rising. He kissed the top of the dwarf's head before leaving the room with Thranduil.

"Let us speak then in the garden," Legolas said. "It is a beautiful morning and our voices will not disturb Gimli."

The garden was meagre by comparison to the lushness of many palaces in Valinor. It was a peasant's garden. Vegetables grew on one side, flowers on the other. They were ones he had not seen in years and he suspected their seeds have been brought on the voyage over. A bench rested against the cottage, a few pillows piled on one end and a blanket folded underneath them.

Legolas moved the comforts to the side and gestured for his father to sit.

"Elrond says he does not have long," Thranduil said.

"No," Legolas agreed. "He grew ill a few weeks ago. His heart nearly gave out near twenty years ago and we have been lucky since then. We knew this day would come. He is facing it better than I. He has perhaps a few days at the most, but he and I both feel it will be sooner."

"Elrond says as well that he does not believe you will last long after he passes."

Legolas murmured, "That seems likely, though Gimli wishes it otherwise. That is why we came here to Valinor after Aragorn passed. He did not want me to be alone. Perhaps he thought it would encourage me to linger after his death, but even the seas cannot console me. He holds my heart and I know I will perish without him."

"He is mortal, child. It is his nature to die as yours is to live."

"I know," Legolas said. "And if I die, I will go to the Halls of Mandos and whether or not I am reborn, I will be forever bound to Arda and he will not. When he dies, it is our final parting. Whether or not I live or die, I will have forever lost him. At least in the Halls of Mandos my soul may find some rest."

Thranduil felt his ire rise. "Legolas, this is foolish. You are young and you have not bound yourself to him. You will survive and flourish again. Do not give into this gloom, you are too strong to wither away for a dwarf."

"I had thought you were here to comfort me," Legolas snapped, "but you mock our friendship still. He is the one I love most in this world and I am his. If you are here to judge me, then leave. Let us spend our final hours together in peace."

Legolas stormed back into the cottage and returned to the bedroom. Elrond soon came to the garden and sat beside Thranduil.

"He truly loves him," Thranduil whispered in shock.

Elrond agreed, "He does."

"Will the dwarf suffer long?"

Elrond replied, "He says he is not in much pain. I have eased his burdens and Legolas rarely leaves his side. His heart weakens and soon it will stop. He will most likely die by tomorrow night, if not sooner. I have agreed to be here when the times comes to ease him through the trial and to provide comfort to Legolas. I have offered Legolas to live in my own home for a time, but he wishes to remain here."

"I do not understand him," Thranduil said.

"Legolas has lost all of his companions and Gimli is the last and his most treasured. His grief runs deep and without the one he loves most, that grief may consume him. He is Elven and our hearts do not heal easily. Speak to him again and soften your tone. He needs his father."

Thranduil returned to the bedroom with a bowed head. The dwarf was resting, his eyes closed. Legolas lay beside him, his hand in his. He spoke to him, but Gimli did not respond, only squeezing his hand. Legolas rested his head on his chest, listening to his heart while it still beat. Thranduil felt that it was too intimate a moment to interrupt and went into the den filled with treasures. Elrond sat by the fire, a tome in his hands.

Elrond said quietly, "The dwarves bring their material goods around their deathbed, to show all what they have achieved in their lives. When I offered to help move his possessions into their room, he said that all he needed were the locket he keeps of Galadriel's gift and his family ring. His fingers have grown too swollen to wear the ring and Legolas carries it now, but I think he fears to wear it himself."

"I will wait here," Thranduil said. "I will be here for if he calls to me."

For nearly a day and night, Legolas did not leave the room except to bring Gimli warm water and more blankets. Thranduil waited, seeing his son fading more and more each time he passed.

The Elves as a race do not cry loudly. They bare their grief in relative silence, even alone. But Legolas cried out like a wild animal, his sorrow echoing through the home. Elrond entered the room but Legolas did not leave. Eventually, Legolas came through the door, his body trembling. Thranduil caught his son before he hit the floor and brought him to armchair. He brought him warm water and honey and sat with him while he drank it, still sobbing. Legolas embraced his father and Thranduil held him like he had when he was a child, cradling him in his arms. 

"I cannot do this," Legolas whispered. "I cannot. He is gone and I...I will go too."

Thranduil wiped away his tears with his thumbs. "Listen to me, Legolas, hold fast. What you say is true. If you fade now, your soul will be separated from his, but if you live, my beloved son, if you live then there is still hope. When the world ends and the world grows anew, I do not believe that any of the children of Illuvatar will be kept from each other. Survive, live, and perhaps you will see your Gimli again. But you must live, Legolas. You will not be alone."

"I am utterly alone, Ada," Legolas said, shaking his head.

"I am with you," Thranduil pleaded. "I will not abandon you again and I will love you and cherish you. Please, Legolas, fight. It is what he wanted for you, you told me so."

Legolas broke into tears and Thranduil said no more, holding his exhausted son.

Thranduil would stay with him even after Gimli was buried under a cairn of stones in their garden. Legolas still chose to live in the cottage but Thranduil visited often and eventually Legolas came to visit him too. Legolas started wearing Gimli's ring and Thranduil said nothing to him, other than that it suited him.

Legolas gained some of his colour, growing stronger again, but his eyes never recovered, remaining pale and grieved. He spent more time with the Lady Galadriel as he recovered and then traveled Valinor end to end, exploring his new homeland. 

But when he had seen all he wished, he returned to his little cottage and waited for the day that all would be remade so he would be with his heart again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I personally think "B Side" is more hopeful, so hang in there.


	2. B Side

Thranduil had many visitors to his estate in Valinor and was always delighted to show them the hospitality of the former Woodland Elves. But seeing the white horses approach, he knew this was no ordinary visit. The Lady Galadriel had come to see him without warning and his heart quickened in his chest.

Galadriel walked with him through his courtyard and told him of her vision. 

"I have seen him, Thranduil. I have seen your son. He sails into the West as we speak. I see you hold him in your arms once again."

Thranduil whispered, "Legolas?"

Galadriel smiled. "Your son lives still and he approaches soon in a ship of his own making."

"He comes alone?" Thranduil asked. "None of his kin come with him?"

Galadriel replied, "He is with the one who loves him most."

Thranduil's heart opened and joy blossomed with it. Legolas was safe. Perhaps he was married now and wished to spend his days with his love in the Undying Lands. After nearly a hundred years apart, he would see his only son again. It brought him such solace that he found himself breaking into a song of celebration. Galadriel left without a word, but he found it did not matter. Legolas was coming home.

***

Word of a ship on the horizon sung through the city. An Eldar had not crossed for over seventy years and the boat in question was small and ill crafted. Thranduil ran like a carefree child to the harbour, waiting as the dawn rose over the seas. A ship reached the shore and elves went forward to anchor it. Legolas stepped into view, his smile wide as he saw his father. Thranduil once again felt the urge to sing, but restrained. They would sing together, as they had when he was young. It was only another moment.

When the boat docked, Legolas did not disembark, but went into the cabin. To Thranduil's shock, Legolas assisted an elderly dwarf onto the shore, both taking the first step together. The dwarf was relatively sprightly considering his age, but Legolas still kept his arm around his shoulders as if he were made of finely spun glass. Thranduil's eyes met his sons and he saw that his body had not been bound to another. Legolas was not married nor had brought any sort of maiden with him. Only a dwarf. 

The dwarf reassured Legolas he was fine and the young elf raced to his father, embracing him. Thranduil was caught off guard by such open affection and pulled apart from him, holding him at arm's length. The song died in his throat.

"You almost look as if you've grown," Thranduil said in surprise.

"Your lad has gained a good few stones in the past year," the intruder quipped, walking towards them. "We have dined like kings before we parted from Middle-Earth. My people in Aglarond threw a feast that lasted a near Age. He'll have the belly of a dwarf soon."

Legolas teased, "I would rather have that than the foul beard that half your food is caught in."

Gimli shoved him affectionately and Legolas smiled, such a sweet and tender expression that Thranduil wanted to pick the dwarf up and toss him into the water.

"Ada," Legolas said, "this is Gimli, son of Gloin. He fought by my side as a member of the Fellowship and has been a dearest companion for all these many years."

Gimli nodded curtly. "It is an honour, your Highness."

It occurred to Thranduil that he had in fact seen this particular dwarf before and his ire rose. Legolas seemed to sense this, stepping ever so slightly between them. 

"You will dine in my house," Thranduil said, changing his tone. "And we will speak of your many adventures. I will have someone come to bring your things and we will seek refreshment at my Estate. It is only a few hours by horseback, but I have only brought the two horses."

"Gimli will ride with me," Legolas said.

"Horses have never cared for me," Gimli agreed, "but they like your boy better."

Thranduil tried to remain polite. "Then let us go then."

***

Their visit did not last long. Thranduil tried his best, but it was not enough. Legolas sensed his disgust of the dwarf and left after only a few weeks. He built the pair of them a cottage on a hillside viewing the sea and they retired there. Gimli and Legolas toured Valinor, exploring much and meeting many of the Eldar. Thranduil heard word from his kin of their adventures, but Thranduil did not care to hear them. His son had chosen the dwarf over him and Thranduil would let Gimli have him for now. 

He heard word of Gimli's illness through Elrond, who had come to tend to him. The old friends walked through the courtyard, as he had with Galadriel years before.

Elrond said, "The dwarf might live, but even if he does, he is still mortal. Your son will only have so much time with him and viewing his love for him, I fear he might not survive his passing. Legolas feels deeply and loves even deeper."

"He will not fade into nothingness," Thranduil protested. "He is stronger than that and he will move on from this."

Elrond said softly, "My old friend, it is time you tell him the truth. It may save him heartache and protect him from wounds that will not mend."

Thranduil refused, "It does not matter now." 

Elrond insisted, "He is grown and deserves to know that he need not suffer. If you love him, you will do this for him. We must give much of ourselves for our children, but it is something we must give."

"But he will die."

"He will die either way, Thranduil. Let him make his own choice."

Thranduil knew in his heart that Elrond spoke wisely and agreed to see Legolas.

***

Thranduil came to the little cottage, amused by how humble it was. It was filled to the brim of their possessions, just like a dwarf of course. But it was bright and comfortable. He went out into the garden where Gimli lay on a bench, his back supported by pillows and a blanket over his legs. Legolas sat beside him, reading to him. They both looked up in surprise at him.

"Ada?" 

"You look well, Master Dwarf," Thranduil commented.

"The ticker has not given up on me yet," Gimli agreed.

"What are you doing here?" Legolas questioned. 

"I would like to speak to you. Alone, if we could."

Legolas looked hesitantly to Gimli who smiled. "Go on, I'll be right here."

Legolas escorted his father into the den and they sat facing each other before the fireplace. Thranduil looked at his surroundings. It was not just the dwarf's possessions here. Legolas' Mirkwood bow hung on the wall and his favourite books sat on the shelves with an assortment of trinkets, one of which was a badly carved wooden horse. 

"It has been five years, Ada. Why have you come to see me now?"

"How is Gimli?"

Legolas said quietly, "He is ill. His heart began to fail while we were south. He may live, but it is unlikely. We will know better in the next few days. His spirits are high, he fairs better than I in that matter. Now, why have you disturbed us? Have you come to mock my friendship and insist I leave him to die alone?"

"No, that is not why."

"Then speak quickly so I may return to his side." 

"There is something I have never told you, Legolas," Thranduil said. "It is something I hoped to spare from you when you were young and when you did not come to the West...well, I thought you had made your choice regardless."

Legolas' face softened. "Ada?"

Thranduil took his son's hand in his. "We should speak of your mother."

Legolas took a sharp breath in. "What of her?"

"I am not one who is free to speak their feelings and I know I have kept much of my thoughts from you. Perhaps this shows as coldness. I do not discuss your mother not because she is not beloved to me or that I do not long for her. I needed to be strong for you and for our people. I meant to speak of it with you before you first set for Rivendell, but I hesitated too long. You know that I married late, later than most of our kind. I did not meet your mother until we were already in the Woodland Realm. She was...she was beautiful. We wed the day after we met, knowing that we were chosen for each other. She fled from her home to be with me and we called her by a new name. I loved her and I loved her all the more for giving me you. Those years before she died were the most wondrous of my long life, Legolas. But then, when she was gone, it tore me in two, for I knew she was forever lost to me. I could not lose you too."

"I do not understand."

"Your mother, who all called Aredhel, was known by a different name when she was born. Her name was Gilmith, daughter of Imrazôr and Mithrellas. Sister to Galador, the first Prince of Dol Amroth. When she came of age among men, she ventured into our lands and decided to live among us, embracing her elven heritage. To prevent the wrath of Gondor, we kept her name secret. Though you are elven through my blood, Legolas, your mother was Peredhil, as are you."

Legolas whispered, "I'm half-elven?"

Thranduil closed his eyes as Legolas questioned, "Why did you not tell me, father? Why keep this from me for all these years?"

Thranduil said nothing and Legolas stood, going towards the door. Thranduil called his name, opening his own eyes once more. Legolas leaned against the doorframe, panting in anger. Thranduil went to his side and clasped his son's face in his hands.

"My dearest child," Thranduil murmured, "my only child. Our kind may only once bond, may only know one person for all of eternity. And I gave my heart to your mother and lost her in less than five years. A second in the scheme of all and I still mourn her to this day. I feared to lose you too. When you did not feel the call to the sea as so many of our people did, I knew your mannish blood kept you rooted to your homelands. When you chose not to follow me, I thought perhaps you had learned your true nature and had chosen the mortal path. But I knew in my heart that if you knew the truth, you would stay in Middle-Earth and I would forever lose you."

"So what does it matter now?" Legolas asked bitterly.

"For I see I will lose you regardless," Thranduil admitted. "Your heart is tied to that dwarf and as he ails, I see your own light failing. I do not believe you will survive his death. I have been selfish and you need not forgive me. But know that you have a choice. If you die with him now, your soul may be separated from his for all eternity, for he is not bound to Arda as you are. But if you choose a mortal life and die in your own time, you will be reunited when the world turns anew. You will be reunited with all those you have lost among the mortal men. But you will be lonely. You will suffer and you will die."

Legolas whispered, "You are selfish, father."

Legolas left and Thranduil had not the heart to pursue him. 

***

"You have spoken to him then."

"Yes, but he will never forgive me," Thranduil admitted, "and I will still lose him."

Elrond took his arm. "It is not easy, old friend, to let our children go. But this has been his path since he was begat. His friendship with this dwarf united our peoples and that is something neither of us thought we would see. Legolas has served bravely and you should be proud of him. And Gimli is one worthy of his love. The lady Galadriel herself spoke on his behalf to allow him admission. He carries three strands of her hair close to his heart, his most cherished possession. She has seen into his soul and deemed him pure, Thranduil. That is not something that could be said for either of us."

"Legolas truly does love him," Thranduil murmured.

Elrond agreed, "and he your son. He has left all he knows to follow him here, choosing to die on our soils than his beloved kingdom. Grieve your son's loss, but do not grieve the cause. I have learned this and it has brought me some peace. Perhaps learn more of the dwarf, speak to him, and you will find your burden lighter."

"You have always given me wise council," Thranduil said. "I thank you once again, my old friend."

"Go to your son before it is too late."

***

Thranduil returned to the cottage and upon crossing the threshold could feel the change in the air, feel that all was content. The pair were in the kitchen, bickering amicably as they cooked together. Gimli noticed Thranduil first and nodded to him curtly. Legolas turned and Thranduil's heart sank in his chest. He could see it in his eyes. His son had chosen the mortal path and sensing the wellness in Gimli, felt that Legolas had given him some of his own vitality. 

Thranduil embraced his son and Legolas folded into his touch. When he pulled from him, Thranduil smiled at them. 

"Forgive me," Thranduil pleaded. "Both of you. I did not understand and I acted with my own pride. I love my son and only want his happiness. I see now that what he needs to be happy is to be with you. Forgive me, Gimli, son of Gloin. Forgive me, beloved son."

Gimli said gruffly, "Good, then that foolishness is over. Your Highness, come sit and eat with us."

Legolas smirked at the dwarf. "Now who's not in touch with their feelings? You seem to be tearing up, friend."

"It is an onion and no more."

Thranduil dined with them and returned to his own Estate the next morning. Seeing the two of them together, the laughing, the joking, the tenderness, he knew that Legolas had made the right choice. If his son was happy, then he should join him in that happiness, for whatever time remained.  
***

Gimli grew healthier and Legolas began to age as a mortal man would, quickly catching up to Gimli in appearance over the next thirty years. Thranduil was shocked each time he saw his son to see new wrinkles or white hairs, but Legolas was fascinated and both he and Gimli joked about it easily. 

Gimli's heart gave out in his sleep one night and he passed with no pain. Legolas grieved and buried him in their garden under a cairn of stones from the Glittering Caves. Then with the grace of his Númenórean grandfather, he retreated to his bed and slipped away himself.

Thranduil could not bear to part them and buried Legolas beside Gimli. He would visit often, making sure someone tended their garden. He left the house as it was for a time, using it as a retreat when he needed spaces from others. It was here he felt closest to his son and the wife he would meet again one day. His heart eased its burden and he found joy once again in his life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, before I get a comment about me throwing myself an out, let me just remind you:
> 
> a) Tolkien was super happy rewriting the same story again and again so I think I get to get away with two  
> b) If you can't use minor rarely mentioned characters as plot devices in fanfic, then when can you use them?


End file.
